Grugger’s Way

Many of the events that psychologists list as life-changing are also the most stressful. I have experienced many of those events and have survived them. Not without cost. I am still alive, but marriages have faltered and failed, relationships have been strained, confidences broken, careers re-directed, families asunder. I knew I hit rock bottom when the lives of others were affected by my actions in such a way that I felt they would all be better off without me.

I recognize many of the most stressful life events are made worse by addiction and dependency. Whether it is drugs, alcohol, cigarettes, or a personality disorder, these outside influences make matters worse. People will argue that “if it wasn’t for my smokes, I would never have made it through this.” I think I will give people the benefit of the doubt. If they survive, they can credit anything they want to, but usually such a dependency becomes an excuse for failing, rather than a reason for succeeding.

If you have been here near the bottom, or what you think must be rock bottom, remember that we all have the power within ourselves to reach out and get help.

Whether it is a loss by death or divorce, a drastic change in circumstances by choice or imposed by others, we learn from our experiences. By the time we reach our sixties we have undoubtedly been required to draw from strengths deep within our psyche to even reach this age. There isn’t much that can seriously disrupt our sanity any more.